Saturday, December 29, 2007

Criticism and Dried Well

It needs not even a single sweat drop to criticize on things that bothered us, things that against our view or values, whilst it can be a hell of a job to fix or improve it for those who are inside the circle, the box, especially when it's related with paradigm, attitude, habit, politics, money, power, sex.

We can't be good in all things, nor can be bad in everything. Some people are very good in making critics, some others are very good in getting things done. It's quite rare that a person can have both traits with equal strength, and hence they need each other, provided that there's a healthy communication between the two.

Throwing critic to someone or to an institution is as important as giving a praise, appreciation or encouragement. It's a matter of taste, whether bitter or sweet, and both are healthy for the mind, heart and soul (mihes). But be careful with the dosage to be given; too little will not work and too much will become a deadly poison.

My personal experience, be it in professional or private life, excessive critics thrown by me maybe an indication that something is going on with my mihes (mind, heart and soul). If mihes are imagery wells, the water will be abundant when we continuously deposit old and new things into them, by readings, learning new things, meeting (new) people, doing creative things, performing worship, listening to music, going to concerts, doing social activities, etc.

When the mind well is drying up, we may have little information or few thoughts to share with others. The comments or the articles we wrote may not be that intelligent or deep enough to inspire others. It's time then to spare time to read books that we have bought but have never been opened, have lunch or coffee with friends, attend seminar or professional gatherings, or contemplate to hone our mind.

The heart well is drying up when we get bored with what we are doing, with what we are and who we are today. Life is just pale, bleak, not enough color to cheer our days up. That's probably the wake up call for us to stop going to malls, and go to see music concerts, plays, poetry readings, painting exhibitions, or visit museums. Maybe also it's time to play our "jablay" guitars or pianos and learn new songs or compositions.

The indication that the soul well is drying up is when we lost our direction in life, words of wisdom are becoming rare, more criticism rather than giving positive advice or contribution, stingy to others and indulge in ourselves too much, see life as a mere profit and loss transactions. Then it's the time to do fasting, make our stomach hungry twice a week, pray the way we want and know what we say, read and learn the holy book and other books of wisdom, meet Khidir -the wise men- and mingles with them.

As a normal person, our mihes also follow "cokro penggilingan" rule, the wheel of life. There are ups and downs. We just need to watch out for the signals, and make necessary adjustments, before the wells completely dried up and needs major treatments to fix them.

13 comments:

  1. Hi,

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    ReplyDelete
  2. hi.. can't find the page of brothers syndrome from the link you gave me. but thanks for dropping by. :)

    merry christmas!

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  3. i really like your article Mr Bambang..
    but..
    i hope you can write it in bahasa to..
    i can't understand it well..
    (sorry, i can't write and read english well)
    i just guest it..
    but i know what you are writing about..

    this is my favorite sentence from your article..
    "We Can't be good in anything, nor can be bad in everything"..
    wow..
    why i never found this sentence before..
    its really inspiring..
    I always try to do all of my work..
    i think that it will be better if i do it allone..

    and this one..
    "Throwing critic to someone or to institution is as important as giving praise, appreciation or encouragement"..
    I am so scary to critic someone else..
    i know that he was making mistake..
    but i scare if he don't accept my critic..
    but right know..
    i will try to critic him..
    maybe he will be glad if i critic him..

    Thank you..

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  4. @Károly Domonyi: Hi, thanks for stopping by and taking the time to make the comment. It's nice to know someone from hungary :)

    @Carla: hi jeng, you can find the article in one of the September postings. never mind :).
    best wishes for the new year

    @hams: thanks for the compliments bung, it's more of an excercise for me to write in English, and hopefully can reach wider readers. will think again for using Indonesian language.

    Wow, I just realized that the phrase you quote: "We Can't be good in anything, nor can be bad in everything".. may not be that correct. It should say" We can't be good in all things, ..." Thank you so much!

    Wish you all the best with your journey in life. MGBU.

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  5. Love this post. Reaching the end of 2007, I have been busy looking deep down into my heart and soul and your post is inspiring.

    But be careful with the dosage to be given; too little will not work and too much will become a deadly poison.

    Also I think it's important to know when to deliver the critics, and how we deliver them.

    For someone who's far from perfect, I always like to receive any positive critics from my surroundings. Although when hearing it for the first time sometimes feels like swallowing a cough medicine, I know it's important to see ourselves from different perspectives.

    Happy New Year, Mas!

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  6. ...
    hahaha..
    i am so sorry..
    you know lah about my english..
    thanks for your correction..
    ...
    happy new year sir..

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  7. @Finally Woken: hi jeng, absolutely agree with the when and how. we are all in the process of being jeng, nobody's perfect :D.
    Enjoy the New Year's Eve party!

    @hams: the mistake was mine bung :D. salam.

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  8. I'm totally agree with the 'drying up' things. It's well described. :)

    It shows how we should never stop learning by books, exchanging ideas with friends, and open to the critism to be a better man every single day ^^

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  9. CresceNet10:37 PM

    Gostei muito desse post e seu blog é muito interessante, vou passar por aqui sempre =) Depois dá uma passada lá no meu site, que é sobre o CresceNet, espero que goste. O endereço dele é http://www.provedorcrescenet.com . Um abraço.

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  10. This is a good post to end the new year.

    It's time then to spare time to read books that we have bought but have never been opened, have lunch or coffee with friends, attend seminar or professional gatherings, or contemplate to hone our mind.

    Sometimes, those simple things are not enough to recharge our mihes, it might works but maybe for temporary period. Maybe, the necessary thing to do is a big change, totally new move and maybe radical one but in a positive way.

    And I am agree with Anita on this one:

    It's important to know when to deliver the critics, and how we deliver them.

    No matter how hard the critics are, if "the how to deliver" is right people will accept it with an open mind and heart.

    Happy New Year

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  11. @sakuralady: yupe, absolutely agree jeng; just need to check once in a while whether we are on the right track :D

    @CresceNet: fortunately there's google translation so i can understand a little bit the portugese :), thanks "bung".

    @Ecky: it's glad that u like it jeng. yeah it's a choice between incremental or radical changes, but we do need both of them.
    All the best for 2008!

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  12. Hey Ecky if its incremental then its fine but when its radical in google translation i think might well have to face some problem anyways guys all the best.

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  13. it's nice to received positive critics from others, but we should learn how to accept negative critics, too

    ReplyDelete